Tips for Long Distance Grandparents

Staying close to grandchildren when miles separate you can feel daunting. At Cottage Grove Place, the only senior living community in Cedar Rapids, IA offering LifeCare®, we understand the unique challenges of long distance grandparenting. Whether you’re down the highway in Chicago or across the country in Seattle, these practical tips will help you build strong bonds, share family traditions and create lasting memories—even from afar.

Video calls

Video calls are the next best thing to in-person visits. A reliable internet connection and a quiet, well-lit space in your Cottage Grove Place apartment-home or common area set the stage for meaningful conversations. Here are three tips to help you get started:

1. Be an active listener

When your grandchild is talking about a school project or the latest dinosaur discovery, give them your full attention. Maintain eye contact by looking into the camera, nod and smile to show you’re engaged and ask follow-up questions like “What made you choose that art project?” or “How did the game end?”. This level of active listening reassures kids that you value their thoughts even when you can’t be in the same room.

2. Watch the time

Young children have shorter attention spans, and even older grandchildren may get tired of a video session after a while. Aim for 15 to 20 minutes with toddlers and 30 to 45 minutes with school-age kids. You can always schedule a follow-up call rather than pushing for one long conversation that leaves everyone restless.

3. Don’t take it personally

If your grandchild seems distracted or doesn’t reply right away, remember they may be multitasking—playing with a pet, coloring or grabbing a snack. Patience and gentle prompts like “Can you show me your favorite toy?” or “What are you drawing now?” can steer the conversation back. A little flexibility goes a long way in keeping video calls fun.

Plan the visit, virtual or otherwise

Whether you’re coming to Cedar Rapids or hosting grandkids at Cottage Grove Place, thoughtful planning makes visits memorable and stress-free.

Choose age-appropriate activities

For toddlers, you might organize a simple craft station in our activity room with washable paint and big paper. School-age grandchildren often enjoy baking cookies in the shared kitchen or exploring our community garden. Teenagers may prefer a movie night in the media lounge or a walk along nearby trails. Tailoring activities to developmental stages keeps everyone engaged and builds confidence.

Share calendars

Use a shared digital calendar or a simple paper planner to coordinate visits, video calls and special events such as birthdays or Grandparents’ Day. At Cottage Grove Place, our front desk staff can even print updated calendars for you and mail them to family members. When everyone knows the schedule, surprises are minimized and anticipation builds excitement.

Useful apps

Smartphones and tablets offer a host of apps built for family connection:

• Marco Polo combines video messaging and voice notes so you can send short clips that grandkids watch at their own pace.
• WhatsApp and FaceTime let you create group chats with kids, parents and siblings to share photos, stickers and quick updates.
• Cozi Organizer can share recipes, activities and vacations, helping family members feel like they’re part of your daily routine.
• Google Photos enables automatic photo albums that grandchildren and parents can view and comment on.

Take some time to learn each app together during a video call so everyone can ask questions.

Send them updates

Keeping grandchildren in the loop cements the feeling that you’re part of their everyday life, even when you’re not physically present.

Snail mail

A handwritten card or postcard carries a personal touch that digital messages can’t match. At Cottage Grove Place, our activities team holds monthly letter-writing sessions where residents compose notes, draw pictures and address envelopes to grandchildren near and far. Kids love receiving decorated envelopes and often proudly display letters on their bedroom walls.

Cultural differences

If your grandchildren live in a different region, state or country, you may encounter cultural differences in school schedules, holidays or family routines. Embrace these variations by inviting grandchildren to teach you their celebrations. Ask them to show you crafts for regional festivals or teach you songs in another language during a video call. Sharing cultural traditions fosters mutual respect and expands everyone’s worldview.

Remember that you have a life too

While it’s natural to want constant contact, maintaining your own routines and interests makes you more interesting to grandchildren. At Cottage Grove Place, you can attend fitness classes, book clubs and art workshops. When you share stories about your pottery class or gardening club, you model a healthy, balanced life and create new conversation topics to discuss with grandchildren.

The other grandparents

Co-grandparenting across distances often involves coordinating with siblings, in-laws or close friends. Communicate openly about boundaries, gift-giving and visit schedules to avoid overlap or hurt feelings. Consider rotating video call days or alternating holiday visits so each grandparent has special one-on-one time. This teamwork ensures grandchildren receive consistent love from all sides.

Cottage Grove Place offers a lifestyle filled with joy and endless possibilities, supported by abundant amenities and gracious hospitality. Whether you want to engage in social activities or enjoy peaceful moments in our beautifully designed homes, our community provides the perfect balance. Explore more by visiting Contact our page.

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